Genealogy Chat

Hi all, been in contact with itv, divulged all the info I know, basically theres no way of tracking my dad, help, dont even know his name, gonna give up now I think, any ideas? Thankyou

I really dont see, sad as it is , that without a name there is any way you can find out - and i appreciate that must be very very hard. I would be wary , very wary about following media suggestions though, 'they have an end to meet' and may one day come back to you with something , whoever long shot or innapropriate. Dont know what to suggest really jess x

Thanks jess, I think it really is time to put it to rest.

Hi Louise Ditto to the comments made by Jess,and despite whatever you feel at the moment remember there are others in the same position (myself included). Although i have a name it's a rumour passed through three people then to me,it has led to a possible link elsewhere,but proving the link is nigh on impossible. I could follow the other siblings but with the info i have it looks like my (possible) father had children by at least 12 different women(the list grows weekly). Sometimes i want to try and prove the rumour,others i would rather leave it alone. I think the only definative way to prove anything in my case would be through modern science/medicine,but could i?should i?and would any of the others want to go down that route? For now the urge to further my family is not as strong as it was,but next week could be different,who knows? Not much help to you i know,but as Jess says,it's difficult to know what to suggest> Glen

Thanks Glen, youre right, it does change from week to week, it seems to get to me more when I'm on my own & I should be able to pick the phone up to talk to him, but I cant, Louise.

Both my BM and the man i suspect to be my BF died in the eighties,so we share the problem of not being able to ask. I at least do have some information about him,his many partners and offspring,his problems with the bottle etc,i'm just not sure if it is the right man. The 'missing' part we feel will always be there,the stark reality of this particular person who may be my b/f is one i feel is best left alone for now,too many other things come ahead of 'him' at the moment. I try to hold my head high and not think too much of him,you are who you are,i am who i am despite the misgivings we may feel. It's something only 'we' know the feeling of,and nothing is right or wrong,nothing written in stone and no help manual on the shelf to tell us how to do it. I can't really say any more than that,but don't feel guilty with yourself or feel you have failed in any way,sometimes it is just not meant to be. Glen

Thanks Glen, i know what your saying is completely true & makes more than obvious sense, but sometimes you wish there was a manual on the shelf. But like you say I'll keep my chin up & ignore the mess thats in my head, at least to look at me I'm normal!!

There was that guy who managed to find his biological father through DNA testing via a website, starting without any information, but I'm pretty that was Y-chromosome testing so no good to you. Sorry can't think of anything else. What a shame. Kate.

thanks Kate, if it was possible that would be just as big a task, imagine trying to get aall those men to take the test, at least I'm too old for the csa to get involved!

hi louise you never know something might be in your file,please keep your chin up sometimes not knowing is better than knowing as iv found out myself hugs angie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thanks Angie, Yes youre probably right, dont worry, I will let you know if theres anything in my file, Louise.