General Chat

Oh, dear! A few weeks ago I told a chap that searching the FreeBMD was 'easy'. He answered back that 'everything is easy when you know how' and deleted his thread before I had a chance to send him his information!

I have felt guilty about it ever since.

In our local library, a while ago, a chap spoke to me about loading his machine. He was struggling so I helped out. When he started to search I casually said that 'these old newspapers are hard on the eyes, aren't they?' I was astounded by his answer 'the documents I am reading are over a 100 years old and don't want distractions'. If I see the blighter again he can struggle for ever!

Good points, everyone! I try really hard to make sure my comments can only be taken the right way so I know what you mean!

I try and read what I want to post in a variety of voices to see if they seem safe!

I think you've got a point, Carol - not just on the boards but in e-mails, text messages and quite a few other things. I quite often read back over my messages before I send them and "flower them up" a bit to the point where it would sound really over-the-top if said out loud.

I am sure it's how a lot of online arguments start, though - because probably without a tone of voice to listen to, people quickly read negative things into words and phrases that were never meant to be negative. (I actually got told off by a "friend" for not asking how she was when I replied to her text message - even though there are only 160-odd characters available! The problem was, I replied to her as soon as she replied and expected that she would answer soon afterwards - but she didn't see it till the next morning.)

Maybe arguments also start because it's so quick and easy to reply online? I do agree that I've seen a lot of posts where I have wondered why people feel the need to add barbed comments, rather than just ignoring things.

Hi CC

I have to agree that some answers - and not always by the same people - do come over as very abrupt or rude whether unintentionally or otherwise.

I think if a person 'knows' who they are responding to they can gauge how the reply will be taken. When answering a thread by someone that they don't know it is better to be polite and middle of the road as the person who started the thread may for many reasons feel hurt or upset by what is written.

I say this as I was once spoken to as if I was a 5 year old and in a very condescending manner and it immediately got my back up

This has only happened once and I replied to them by pm. Otherwise I like reading and joining in on these boards.

This is only my personal thoughts

Wendy x

No Deanna you have never been rude xx
Just some responses, when you read them just come over that way--I'm sure its not meant in most case, but perhaps people who do mean to be offensive should read what they write and and maybe wonder whether thy would lke to be the receiver--maybe I'm too old fashioned-I dunno xxx

I have to own up to sometimes reading my answers back and thinking that they don't come across as I meant them to, because of that I have to do a double check on other peoples answers and think how they usually write.

yes some people are over abrupt to the point of rudeness. But I am not always sure if it is meant or because of other reasons.

First let me ask.... have I ever been rude to you Carol?
If I have please forgive me.... and tell me.
Anything I say which sounds rude, please don't be offended, I am quite a *laughy* type
of person and NEVER mean to be rude.

When I am rude...... I think it does show, and it is usually in defence of a friend or something which I hold dear.

Deanna X

I don't think it has ever been any different CC. People still write without engaging their brains, they forget that on here there is no body language so people can't see if they are joking or not.

Is it me or are some people a bit "snippy" when answering some threads? I've just been catching up as I haven't been on a while and some of the remarks in some threads are, to be honest, verging on rude in their manner.
Why can't people just NOT answer instead of hurting people feelings, we are all people of different convictions and we should, as adults, be tolerant of other peoples views without being rude!
There I've had my rant for today, lol
Carol x