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Joke emailed to me ...lol

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Stephanie

Stephanie Report 11 Nov 2009 23:46

Hi Sue

Love it - thanks for a good laugh!
Keep 'em coming.

Steph xxx

ShelleyRose

ShelleyRose Report 11 Nov 2009 22:29

I love a good laugh, (could do with more right now)! so please keep them coming.

ShelleyRose x

Sue

Sue Report 11 Nov 2009 19:25

Daff I daren't what will you think of me :-))

The camel one was the tamest...lol

xx

MrDaff

MrDaff Report 11 Nov 2009 18:45

*checks mobile for messages*

*throws hissy*

I am clearly not warped enough!

*swishes toilet brush hairdo*

Flounces

and other stuff like that, lolol

Very good, I hadn't heard it before!

Love

Daff xxxx

Bobtanian

Bobtanian Report 11 Nov 2009 18:40

LOL thats about as old as the joke is........LOL
Bob

Researching:
me and my darling wife at our wedding in 1960

AnninGlos

AnninGlos Report 11 Nov 2009 17:25

*groan, groan groan!!!!

Long time since I saw a pound note!!!!

Researching:
Photo spring Researching Somerset, Dorset, Hampshire, Derbyshire, Staffs, Devon, Glamorganshire. Ingram, Masters, Tamblyn, Knight, Warner, Bate, Allen, Riggs, Dominey, Duffin

Sue

Sue Report 11 Nov 2009 17:14

Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in a failing marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife, naming himself as the beneficiary and then arranging to have her killed.


A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side
underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out
a spouse was £5,000.


The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.

Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man
opened his wallet, displaying the single pound note that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the pound as down payment for the dirty deed.


A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Tesco store. There, he surprised her in the produce department & proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands and as the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene.

Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well. However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police.

Artie was arrested before he could even leave the store and under intense questioning at the police station, he revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements.

The hapless husband was subsequently arrested and charged.

The next day in the newspaper, the headline read ...



You're going to hate me for this...











'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for £1.00 AT TESCO'

Oh, quit groaning!
I don't write this stuff,
I receive it from my warped friends and then
send it on to my other warped friends.

Sue xx