General Chat

yes the people you directed to me are the people i wrote to.when i was a baby i grew up and was told my parents were both patients in a mental hospice and i was the outcome.so i feel a bit weird and that the family dont want to no me.ive come to terms with my past,but in the 70s wasnt mental illness a taboo subject?do you see my point i just would love to no a bit more of my family and let them no im normal married with two goregous children

Anthony, it's far, far more likely that the people have no idea there is a message for them here. (Even if they didn't want to know you, they would likely have opened the message.)

(Is one of these the person I directed you to the other day?)

This site has been going for some years. It's free to put up a tree here. Heaven knows how many people have done it and then wandered off and not been back.

Here's the big thing: if you change your email address and don't come back to GR and change the email address in your "account details", you never receive mail sent from this system.

So you don't get notification that there is a message waiting for you here. And if you don't come back to use the site, you never get it.

This is why I always recommend - get a permanent, free, anonymous account at

www.gmail.com

and use it for this site and anywhere else you would like to put an email address on the net (like in postems at FreeBMD or census corrections at Ancestry).

It's online and you can access it from anywhere.
It stores huge, enormous amounts of messages and files, forever (so they also don't fill up your own hard drive).
It doesn't disclose your location via your ISP info.
You can conceal your identity (*always* wise on the internet) by calling your account something like [email protected]

And it also means that bumph sent out by sites like this where you sign up doesn't clutter up your "real" email account. ;)

But most importantly, it is forever, so if 10 years and 4 ISPs from now you get a message from a distant rellie here at GR, you will get notice of it.


Ultimately, yes, if a person doesn't know you have sent a PM here at GR, you're stuck. Or you have to go looking for them as a living rellie, the way so many people do in discussion threads here -- the electoral roll, the telephone directory ...


Oh, and another thing - it really is unwise to use one's real name on the net, including here. You can go to your "account details" and choose a username, and then also use that username for your "real name", so that when someone clicks on username JoeBlow they see "real name" Joe Blow. If you are in contact with an actual rellie, you of course explain that your username is not your real name.

yes i have.but the strange thing is ive found all these contacts with no reply,maybe im being inpatient,but on my mothers side there is a history of mental illness,so im thinking the worst that other family members dont want to know me,im gutted

Dont despair, we've all been there, but someday soon there will be a breakthrough. Have you tried the trying to find board?

i guess if gr members dont open the mail.your knackerd so i guess is it back to the drawing board?feel very deflated at the moment