General Chat

Not that long ago for me (only 9 years) but . . .

I would have gone up to myself after that assembly in November of Year 11 and told myself to ignore our head of year's rant to us in assembly that we were all going to fail our exams at the rate we we were going because, come August, I would have passed them all (lowest grades I ever got were Bs)

I would have given myself a good shake every time I cast lingering glances at "Him" during Art because he was never going to ask me out and I was about to waste three years having an unrequited crush!

I'd have also told myself to get that stupid idea out of my head that I didn't want to learn to drive once I was 17 because it might have made me stop feeling inadequate on the road once I did pass.

I'd also have told myself to forget about opting for Psychology at college because I would only get an E in my exam and that, nine years later, I would be a self-employed artist so maybe Business Studies might have been a better choice.

I don't know if I noticed any class prejudice - my dad ran his own company but grew up on a farm so I have no idea where that puts us in the traditional class scheme - but at my school there was an element of hierarchy. One other comprehensive was looked down on because it was seen as common, the grammar school in my town that needed an entrance exam to get in was deemed "stuck up", while the grammar school that you could pay to attend and also Stonyhurst College nearby were "posh". I wonder what they thought of our school - probably that we were just an ordinary comprehensive with delusions of grandeur! (When I saw my secondary school music teacher just after I left, he asked if I was at the Catholic sixth form that ours was a feeder school for - when I told him I was at the grammar school sixth form, you could have cut the atmosphere with a knife.)

I would have told myself to take myself off to some place where I would never have to listen to my mother telling me what a complete waste of space I was and how I would never amount to anything, I would learn to be strong and believe in myself and do all the things I have encouraged all my children to do by helping them to achieve all their dreams.

Now my mother is in her 80's she has mental health problems that appear to go back over 50 years so she was not wholly responsible for all the physical and mental abuse she gave me, but she did and i cant love her just feel sadness of all the things we could have done and all the things that could have been .

BUT i have 5 wonderful children and a very good hubby a small business that allows me to spoil myself , my children and grandchildren and if I had taken myself off I would never have had those things, so all was not bad

Pam xx

I would have said to my 16 self, dont get married to the first man that shows some interest in you just because you have a few problems does not mean that there is not someone really nice out there for you.

Go out and and have some fun theres plenty of time to settle down and and have a family.

Surprising that mothers seem to have taken pleasure in denigrating their daughters. Was it jealousy do you think?

If I met my 16 year old self she would probably ask " are "we" happy ? " to which I would brightly smile and say " yes " we " are " .

Whilst brightly smiling she would probably notice that I still have all my own teeth ( that would please her.......lol ) .