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They would have to try to get their hands on the Professor from Gilligan's Island who had not only much scientific knowledge but also of being marooned in a sea of imagination.

Failing that, it was to be Plan 'B', contact MacGyver.

Allan was having difficulties persuading his OH that she needed to climb the tallest tree in the hope that they could get enough signal to use the internet. Otherwise.....

What's all this talk of coins.....all Allan needed was his plastic and a computer to make a purchase........umm.....where to go......Sicily is nice this time of year....how about a trip there maybe OH would like to soak up some sun and sip some wine.....

Not to mention the hoard of silver threepences, and even a fourpenny piece, which his mother used to put in the Christmas pudding.

Yes even at his age Allan was still getting his groats.

Allan was a bit cross about this as he had a stash of florans, halfcrowns, shilling and sixpences. Even a few farthings, all just in case he needed to return to England in a hurry.

...not realising that all the money that the pussycat had was out of date as the pounded was now metric ;-)

They could be back in Pagan times or even in Queensland, not there was much difference between the two.

However, the journey must continue so Allan and his OH took their leave of the owl and the pussycat, pausing only long enough to borrow a rather sticky five pound note.

After dining so well they went to the edge of the sand and dancing to the light of the moon,the moon,the moon.

OMG - three moons. Where were they :-0

The Turkey did invite OH to see his house up on the hill, but wisely she decided she had already been to too many strange places and shouldn't accept an invite just because he was strutting his stuff and feeling important...... Good gracious, she might even end up married off to some unwitting soul, if Turkey was enjoying his position as marriage maker.

No, OH picked up her dish of mince and her runcible spoon and tucked in.

When suddenly, the Owl and the Pussycat, in their beautiful pea-green boat, hove into view.

Allan wondered if they could convey his plea for help to some place of sanity and safety.

Then he wondered if they had been sailing for a year and a day and he was, in fact, in the land where the Bong-tree grows.

He looked wildly around for a pig and a turkey and as all the animals dined on mince and pieces of quince, Allan consumed the last of the tasty fungi he had cooked that morning.

All thoughts of his missive had passed from his mind, as had many wild, technicolour, landscapes.

His last coherent thought was whether the Bong-tree may possibly live up to its name.

Meanwhile, his OH graciously accepted a plate of mince from the Turkey.

and also thirsty and there was a massive pile of empty wine bottles lying around the place.....no corks though....what to use...

Once he’d decided where to send it Allan would need some time working out How to send it.

Pigeon Post might have done, but Allan had been very hungry.....

:-)

"Whoever finds this note send help"....no thought Allan doesn't quite get to the point..."For the love of God I've gone round in circles never getting anywhere....and as much as I hate myself for thinking it...it's been so much fun"....yep thought Allan that'll do it......now where to send it....

Allan had never tried milking a squid of it's ink, sick or otherwise, but soon there was a plentiful supply of dark liquid ready to load into his pen.

Now to get writing............


( Yay, we've reached 1000 replies of this saga )

The problem was solved when Allan saw a squid moving very slowly in circles and hardly moving its tentacles.

It was obviously extremely ill and Allan had no problem catching it.

Taking it to his wife he said, "here's that sick squid I owe you".

Allan always repaid his debts!

...or even an octopus.

Now what to use for bait or do you just tickle them like trout?

It had been so long since Allan had used his Fonteyn pen that the ink had dried up.

So all Allan had to now was catch a squid............

Allan had never needed a laundrette as he had adopted the quaint Australian custom of having a shower whilst wearing his clothes, thus being able to kill two birds with one stone, as it were.

However, he did find the idea of the tutu rather exciting.

He decided to write some notes using his Fonteyn pen.

As Allan hadn’t been anywhere near a launderette it was fortunate that there was a spare outfit. ;-)

At least the Shirley Temple outfit was better than the Ballerina's clothes he was going to wear; that would have been tutu much