General Chat

Top tip - using the Genes Reunited community

Welcome to the Genes Reunited community boards!

  • The Genes Reunited community is made up of millions of people with similar interests. Discover your family history and make life long friends along the way.
  • You will find a close knit but welcoming group of keen genealogists all prepared to offer advice and help to new members.
  • And it's not all serious business. The boards are often a place to relax and be entertained by all kinds of subjects.
  • The Genes community will go out of their way to help you, so don’t be shy about asking for help.

Quick Search

Single word search

Icons

  • New posts
  • No new posts
  • Thread closed
  • Stickied, new posts
  • Stickied, no new posts

Sigh

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

P

P Report 7 Jun 2019 18:27

Good afternoon all,

I hope you have a great weekend!

I just wanted to come on here and sulk abit - i hate that i'm not very clever with family research, it makes it way more difficult and i dont even understand alot of the help sections.

The only other upsetting thing is that i get alot of private msgs questioning why this and why that - which is mind blowing because obviously the whole reason why i'm on here is for RESEARCH - i'm not sure what else could be so suspicious and wrong of me.

So, with that all being said, has anyone got any info/tips and tricks/helpful ways to search? i'm not a beginner but i feel like the more i'm failing in my searches, the more of a "beginner" i feel!

Thank you,
sulk over LOL :)

Dermot

Dermot Report 7 Jun 2019 18:43

Initially, I obtained a reasonable start with my research by asking immediate family members for bits & pieces, carefully noting down what I was told.

Beginning with my own mum & dad, I gained loads of names & their relationships to my family. I didn't expect miracles or accuracy because I appreciated dates & ages may well be just guesses. but I was able to build on what I was told.

On hearing of my efforts, distant relations abroad came up trumps too with marriages, etc on which I could progress.

Don't expect overnight miracles. It can be a slow but encouraging progress. These days, several relations approach me to see if I can confirm or correct bits they are unsure of. Very satisfying when I can help others.

Good luck!

Rambling

Rambling Report 7 Jun 2019 18:57

Stop sulking lol ;-) We were all beginners once :-)

One of the things I didn't say in my last message, that when looking for potentially living people, it's different to looking for the dead ones.

There is an expectation (and obligation) of helpers that they should respect the privacy of those being sought ( even though a lot of the info is in the public domain as such this site is open to everyone whether a member or not, and anything posted here can show up via google) so no exact birth dates, no phone numbers, emails etc It's important to secure people's safety (eg from stalkers, scammers and the like)

Especially important in the case of adoptees for instance, is ensuring the best result possible. Which at minimum, means contact should be approached with caution, no turning up on doorsteps unannounced, or info given on these boards which is un-necessarily personal.

Generally speaking it's better to say why you are interested in finding someone, eg for your self, for a friend you're helping or an adoptee you have offered to trace family for.

We don't know your motives, so sometimes you will be asked what they are :-) Which works both ways, you'd want your own privacy to be respected if the situation was reversed.

Practically speakingthere are free sites we all use, like the GRO index and freebmd.org.uk ( for BMDs).


Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it Report 7 Jun 2019 19:00

Don't be put off

Most of us helpers will willingly look up records but sometimes newer record enquiries are on a why and maybe should we be involved just in case we are treading on sensitive areas basis

There has been instances where someone is asking for info for other than genealogy basis so getting involved could be a problem for the person being enquired about.

SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 7 Jun 2019 20:35

I agree with all the above ....... we're trying to be careful in preserving privacy concerns for other people.

But also, we do occasionally get requests for help from professional researchers who are being paid to do the research, but abuse the free help that we give on here and then pass it off as their own.

Once caught that way, twice shy.


EDITED:- spelling :-D

P

P Report 8 Jun 2019 18:23

Thank you so much everyone. I've found finding people on the family tree has been quite easy but it's the people who are far more distant that are harder to find. I've had a few msgs with some help info for the future too so thank you very much :)

Dermot

Dermot Report 8 Jun 2019 19:11

FAMILY RELATIONSHIP TERMS.

Sometimes, especially when working on your family history, it's handy to know how to describe your family relationships more exactly. The definitions below should help you out.

Cousin (a.k.a "first cousin") :

Your first cousins are the people in your family who have two of the same grandparents as you. In other words, they are the children of your aunts and uncles.

Second Cousin:

Your second cousins are the people in your family who have the same great-grandparents as you., but not the same grandparents.

Third, Fourth, and Fifth Cousins:

Your third cousins have the same great-great-grandparents, fourth cousins have the same great-great-great-grandparents, and so on.

Removed :

When the word "removed" is used to describe a relationship. It indicates that the two people are from different generations. You and your first cousins are in the same generation (two generations younger than your grandparents), so the word "removed" is not used to describe your relationship.

The words "once removed" mean that there is a difference of one generation. For example, your mother's first cousin is your first cousin, once removed. This is because your mother's first cousin is one generation younger than your grandparents and you are two generations younger than your grandparents. This one-generation difference equals "once removed."

Twice removed means that there is a two-generation difference. You are two generations younger than a first cousin of your grandmother, so you and your grandmother's first cousin are first cousins, twice removed.

=======================================
You will be aware that a good tip when researching is to remember that many Irish and Scots families adhered to a particular naming pattern for several hundred years. Sometimes this can help us narrow our particular ancestors down a little.

1st son was named after paternal Grandfather;
2nd son was named after maternal Grandfather;
1st daughter was named after maternal Grandmother;
2nd daughter was named after paternal Grandmother;
any siblings after that being named after other siblings and cousins.

The Right Name For The Right Cousin Conversation on the subject 'who is related to whom' bogs down over terminology, particularly when it comes to defining cousins.


Your first cousin is your parents' brother's or sister's child. However, the first cousin's child is not your second cousin, but your first cousin one removed. The child of the first cousin once removed is your first cousin twice removed, and his child is your first cousin three times removed.

Your second cousin is your grandparents' brother's or sister's grandchild. That second cousin's child is your second cousin once removed, and his child is your second cousin twice removed, and so on.

Your third cousin is your great-grandparents' brother's or sister's great-grandchild. The third cousin's child is your third cousin once removed, and his child is your third cousin twice removed.

Other Occasionally Misunderstood Terms
Siblings: Parents in common, brothers and sisters

Grandnephew and Grandniece: the grandchild of your brother or sister

Grandaunt or Granduncle: the brother or sister of your grandparent

Great-Grandaunt or Great-Granduncle: the sister or brother of your great-grandparents

Stepfather or Stepmother: the husband of your mother or the wife of your father by a subsequent marriage

Stepchild: the child of your husband or wife by a former marriage

Stepsister or Stepbrother: the child of your stepfather or stepmother

Half Sister or Half Brother: the child of your mother and stepfather or the child of your father and stepmother, or of either parent by a former marriage

In-Laws: your connections by the law of marriage (as distinct from relatives by blood) in particular, your husband's or wife's relatives and your own brother's wife or sister's husband

Ancestor: the person from whom you descend directly, such as a grandparent or a great-grandparent

Descendant: the person who descends directly from you, such as a grandson or granddaughter

Lineal Relations: those in a direct line of ascent or descent, such as a grandfather or granddaughter

Collateral Relations: those relatives who are linked by a common ancestor, such as aunts, uncles, or cousins.

All clear now?

From the Web under Half cousins:

Half-siblings share only one parent. Extrapolating from that, if one of John's parents and one of Mary's parents are half-siblings, then John and Mary are half-first cousins.

The half-sibling of each of their respective parents would be their half-aunt or half-uncle but these terms, although technically specific, are rarely used in practice. While it would not be unusual to hear of another's half-brother, or half-sister, so described, in common usage one would rarely hear of another's half-cousins or half-aunt, so described, and instead hear them described simply as the other's cousin or aunt.

And children of half-first cousins are half-second cousins to each other and so on because they would share only one common great-grandparent out of eight instead of two.

Any clearer? My head hurts now!!

There are also cross cousins, parallel cousins and double cousins.

A parallel cousin is the child of the father's brother (paternal uncle's child) or of the mother's sister (maternal aunt's child).

A cross-cousin is the child of the mother's brother (maternal uncle's child) or of the father's sister (paternal aunt's child).

Double cousins arise when two brothers of one family marry two sisters of another family and both pairs have children. These cousins share all four grandparents.

If a woman has a child by each of two brothers, then are the children half siblings or cousins?

Both? Half siblings because they have the same mother.
Cousins because they have the same 4 grandparents.