General Chat

heyya its carols daughter beth i wounded if any one could help me i havent seen my dad 4 the last 2 yrz naily && i waz thinking of rightin him a letter the other day but i no my step mum will read it and i dont want her 2 she waz the one wu stopped me seeing my dad plz help me lots ov luv 2 my mums friends beth xxxx

Hiya Beth, If you want to write to him, you do it. Any doubt about it being opened by anyone else, disguise the envelope. Use a brown official looking one, maybe that might deter anyone from opening it, or of course, you could send it to his neighbours place.

Could you send it to your Dad recorded delivery, ask for only him to sign for it ?? Good luck :0)) Joan

Beth perhaps you could ask your mum to put a thread up on your behalf and that way you will be able to get sugestions properly take care Rosex

Does your Dad work somewhere that has an address you can send a letter 'care of'.?

Sorry peeps my lass got on here when I was in the shower, Her dad has messed her head up and shes lookin for help, Caz xxxxxxxx

The work one is a good idea, at least he will get it first. Caz, do you know where he works?

No problem Caz, she seems to be missing her dad badly

I do Theresa, He is a sanctimonious ass who is ruled by his wife, Sorry all, my lass is so unhappy, Caz xxxxxxxxxxx

Caz, regardless of what you think of him, Ithink it would be a good idea to send a letter to him at work. Whether or not he will reply is another thing, and Beth needs to be prepared for that too, but if it makes her feel better...

Bless her.

aww bless her,give her a hug from auntie joy,xxxxxxxxxx

Thanks all, I would just love him to care for his kids, but hes even changed his phone no so am not hopeful, Caz xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Caz I say this with your daughter's best interests at heart, please believe me. My daughter wanted to do this when she was about 15. I said I did not have an address for him - true, but I could have found out. I did this because I KNEW what would happen - bitter disappointment, which she really couldn't have handled at that stage in her life. She is your daughter and only you can judge how she would handle possible rejection. You are in a difficult position and you have my sympathy - I truly hope it works for her. MEN. OC

My son, now 24, used to see his dad if I took him to Malta and his dad used to spend a lot of time with him then, and take him to see his nanna and aunt etc as well as write to him and send him things, but once his girlfriend, now his wife, got her claws in things changed and at a difficult time - just as my son was 13. We visited and son spent time with his dad but the half brother of just 3 was always on the scene and the step mother (definitely the wicked type!) always came with them when son was brought back to the apartment. They came to say goodbye at the airport and to my surprise, son's dad kissed my on the cheek to say goodbye. From that day my son heard little from his father and if he did it was signed by his name, not dad anymore. The half brother was told we were family friends!! My son's nanna and aunt keep in touch with cards sometimes but nothing from the father. My son has grown up to be quite philosophical about it and knows I did everything I could to keep the contact going. He now says 'Dad's a p**t' and is looking forward to visiting Malta one day (probably next year, with me) and looking down on his father who will be shorter than son now he is fully grown, and waiting to see what his half brother, now 14, thinks of parents who lie to him about his family. There will be no doubt who my son is because he has a lot of the look of his dad about him. I think you should let your daughter try to make contact, via the work place, maybe just a short letter saying she would like the chance to get to know him again, if he is interested, and that she doesn't necessarily expect to be welcomed into his new family but she would like him to be in her life. She could tell him a little about what she is doing at school, the subjects for her exams etc. and what hobbies she has and if he sees she is a well rounded happy girl who isn't begging to spend weekends or holidays etc with him, he might at least get in touch. She would have to be prepared for a knock back but as you can see it hasn't done my son a lot of damage and at least you cannot be blamed for stopping her or not helping her get in touch. Good luck. Liz

Hello Caz, Yes, I agree it is a difficult situation, but there again, if you let Beth write a little letter, it keeps you in the right in her eyes and she won't think that YOU are stopping her from seeing her Dad. How old is Beth? You poor soul. As if you haven't got enough on your plate at the moment. Good luck. Margaret