General Chat

A married friend of mine who always declared that her friendship with her male cyber friend was definately only platonic admitted to methat she had feelings for him.........she has met him ...he's a fair bit older than her but she'd always denied having a *thing* for him....she asked me for my advice and I said to steer well clear.

She did for a while but it appears the old problem is starting up again.

Of course...it's not really my business but it just goes to show how easy it is to delude yourself about your feelings .......both to yourself and others.

This cyber business can be very dodgy sometimes can't it.....

What appears as harmless flirting can often turn out to be far more damaging in the long run.

Personally I'd cut all ties with the cyber person if I were in that position but I guess it's different strokes for different folks.

Has anyone on here ever fallen into *lust* or indeed love which originated on the internet. Anyone know of any good stories because every thing I've ever heard only has a bad ultimate outcome.

I 'm hoping she comes to her senses soon cos this guy is a real slimeball imho xx

Jan and Rick met here, I believe, and are happily married.

If she's of a "certain" age or feeling a little dissatisfied with her life then she's probably vulnerable and this fellow may have worked that out. She probably feels flattered by the attention and sees it as harmless because it's over the internet. I've seen a marriage almost break down because of the husband's "harmless flirting". I've also seen a young couple "meet" over the internet, meet in real life and marry but I've hear more bad stories than good.

Sue xx

Yeah Suemaid I agree, I am the worlds biggest flirt and I dont even realise when I do it, I dont flirt over the internet or have any *special friends * I have loads of friends of both sexes, I love my OH I am happy and get all the attension I need off him, I would never do anything that if I found my OH doing I know would hurt me, so as I say in life dont to them that you wouldnt like being done on you..

I am sure that good partnerships have been fostered on the internet between those that were free to form them, but, as in real life, a lot of damage can be done by flirting, that is true in cyber land as in real life.

Yes Sue she's a woman of a *certain age* and prob just enjoys being given the attention.......shame though cos her hubby is a real sweet bloke.

I feel the same re my OH Hayley.......though I'm not particularly flirty.......never have been ......*sighs* always was *one of the lads*

Ann a good friend of mine had a marriage break up due to cyber relationships that went too far.......I've seen first hand the devastation it can cause and that's why I flinch sometimes when I see overt flirting.......even if it is supposedly innocent........xx

I have a wonderful friend who I have known for over 20 years.We can go to the cinema to see a film our OH's don't want to see,and can go for a lunch out together.He and I will talk about anything ,I probably know more about his past than his wife does....and it is quite something!!!!! I love him to bits,but just as a really good friend.There would never be anything inappropriate and my OH knows that.

My daughter met her boyfriend on Match.com and he is very nice!

When they've been together a bit longer I might remind him of the money back guarantee!

Joking apart, neither of them have any ties, though they are both divorced, so this would make a difference.

One of my best mates is a bloke Jane and I definately agree it CAN be done........which was why I was more than a tad shocked when friend admitted that her feelings for cybermanslimeball were more than she'd let on......especially when she was so scathing about those who questioned their friendship........and I took her side on it too !!!!

I definately know from experience that platonic relationships between the sexes can be long lasting and genuine xx

Muffy ,like you say a platonic relationship does work.Just because it is someone of the opposite sex doesn't mean you are going to leap into bed with them.

I bet you was *shocked * Muffy, Jane yes can be,

Hi Muffy,
Your remark re: cybermanslimeball, there are also cyberwomenslappers.

It takes two you know, its never one sided.

Hello Rambling Rose,
But its always the guys who seem to be the villains.

Hello George, as you say , it takes two but I think women lie better !

Personally I think if you have a partner, you shouldn't be putting out to anyone whether you are male or female...at least without having the decency to tell your OH that's what you are doing! If you're not happy in a relationship get out of it, don't mess around with other people's lives in an attempt to have a bit of interest in your own....

Rose ...aka a 'loose cannon' tonight lol

I do get fed up hearing that its always the guys fault,

I had a bad one that's gone now, thank god, and my mate had an even worse one, so woman are just as bad as guys

Absolutely, Rose

I couldn't agree more.

Man or woman - you're either with someone or you're not.

Sue x

Absolutely, Rose

I couldn't agree more.

Man or woman - you're either with someone or you're not.

Sue x

I think I might start a thread lol

'The disillusioned, twice bitten , never going to do this again, single forever, club....genuine members only'

By all means, do that Rose


Maybe I could start one too - when you've had the best, the rest is a an also-ran

Sue x