General Chat

Dear All

Hello

Do you believe that when a man is introduced to a woman he should stand up as a form of courtesy?

And do you think that a man should give up his seat on the bus for a women?

Replies welcome

Hope you are all well.

Best wishes
xx

Hi Elizabeth

I think it is lovely to see a man being a real gentleman.

Unfortunately there are quite a lot of women who either don't think that way, or are unable to use their own manners in reply to the gentlemen.

Therefore I think we see less of this chivalry as time goes on.

I did notice though, that when I was pregnant with my son, all men were protective of me, holding shop doors open for me etc. The minute he had been born it went back to shop doors slamming in my face. But - try to cross a road with a pram and a man will always stop to let you go across, whereas the women totally ignored you or rushed you up.

Dianne xx

whilst I find it pleasant to see someone doing a gentlemanly courtesy, we ladies have to appreciate that we can't have it every way. We want sexual equality therefore we must also accept the downside.

However, good manners in general do seem to be on the decline between people. Please and thankyou never go amiss.

Young or old, some are polite and others are just plain ignorant.

Hazel

Dear Ladies

Hello

Thank you kindly for your replies.

My evening is going fine, thank you Arctic Blonde.
Just recovering from doing some shopping!! No parking, so we took the bus and the queues were very long.

I have found that a lot of young people are very polite, whereas a lot of men sit on their bus seats (older than 25!) and refuse to give up their seat for a pregant lady or an elderly person. I think that as a rule a man should stand up to meet a woman. It is a gesture of respect.

Dear Dianne, I found the opposite.The men would sit in their seats and it was the women who gave theirs!

Dear Ancient Mariner, yes equality has come in but I agree that basic manners do not go amiss and people notice these things.

Very best wishes to you ladies.
xx

I would give up my seat for a man or woman if I thought I was taking up a seat that someone else really needed.Hold a door open for someone ,let someone go in front of me me in a queue if they only have a couple of things.
I hope that doesn't make me sound too smarmy ..........cos I'm not .........I just have good manners lol

Hi Elizabeth i was brought up with manners always to say please and thankyou and hold the door open for someone i always give up my seat for an elderley or pregnant women i think its the way you are brought up by your parents whether you have manners or not

I would give up my seat on the bus to anyone who needed it without a thought, but this manners in youngers has got me thinking. I have brought my three daughters up with very good manners (all the same way) they all have chilren of their own, but the middle daughter is very lapse with her daughters manners.

Yes, manners are lacking in some but not all. It's not just in young people either, I've experienced good and bad manners in people of all ages.

I wouldn't expect a man to give up his seat for me on a bus just because I'm female nor would I expect one to stand up just because I walk into a room.

You either have good manners or not .......I like to think I have.....(not blowing my own trumpet or anything),but I was brought up knowing what good manners were ,and it has stuck ,and I hope I have passed that on to my children too...........It's not too difficult to be good mannered .

I like to think i have good manners and that my children and Grandchildren do too. Among the young it is mixed but I think there are more well mannered than bad. I also think they are better mannered if they are on their own, no peers to impress. One thing that annoys me is the person who sits in the elderly/disabled seat on the bus and doesn't get up when they are needed. And this is quite often a man in his 30s/40s. And I have to say that is anyone is going to let a door slam back in my face it is usually a female round about my age (69).

I had a wonderful conversation the other day when we kept holding a door open for eachother.I held if for her and then she held it for me lol.She said "Aren't we polite" .......I said yes ,it is because we are English" She said " you are quite right ...we even queue to be polite .That would not happen in another country lol

Do you believe that when a man is introduced to a woman he should stand up as a form of courtesy?

- Yup. I believe that anyone who is introduced to anyone should stand up. It is rude for anyone to remain seated when being introduced to someone who is standing.

And do you think that a man should give up his seat on the bus for a women?

- Nope. Not unless the woman is plainly pregnant or is old enough to have difficulty standing on a moving vehicle, or has a young child, or is otherwise obviously in more need of a seat than someone else who has a seat. Of course, a seated woman should offer her seat to a man in similar circumstances ... and a man to a man, and a woman to a woman ...


Never understood why manners would have anything to do with the sex of the individuals in a situation, myself. Or why it would ever be considered good manners to treat other people in a particular way based on their sex, or any other irrelevant characteristic.

Whilst stood at the bus stop on Friday (for a busthat didn't turn up), i watched a group of lads in 'hoodies' leaning against the wall, attempting to look 'hard'.
Then I noticed a blind lad - about the same age - get off the bus and manouvre his way, with a long stick with ball on the end, to the entrance of the bus station - which meant passing these 'hoodies' - he was also using the wall as his guide.
As he approached nothing happened. Then, in one movement, all the 'hoodies' moved away from the wall, let him go by, then resumed ther positions - looking harder than ever!!!

Aaah I thought - despite their look & attitude - they were brought up properly!! LOL

Have to admit, if I come across 'youth ' taking up the pavement an 'excuse me' usually has them moving out of the way, whereas older people..........

My daughter, then in her teens, told me off once - for barging a 10 year old out of my way!
We were catching a bus for a journey over an hour long. A double decker turned up - and I still love sitting on the front left seat on the top deck!
I was paying my fare when a child behind in the queue got on to 'find a seat' while her parent stayed in the queue.
She headed for the stairs - and I rushed in front of her.......

Well I was in the queue first!!

Daughter shamed me into sitting in the seat behind the front one, despite my protestations that the young girl had more years left to sit in the front seat than me :-(

Yes and also remove their hat. sex has nothing to do with it, it common curtesy, good manners and of course the way your parents raised you.To people of my age it is the norm.**M**.

im like you elizabeth, i think and often say loudly, argh chivelry dead then?

if a bloke really irritates me by pusshing past, or something simular,
i was always brought up that a guy walked on outside of you,
or youd walk past a child or elderly lady on the outside so as not to force them toward the road,
or youd give way to someone ,

i always found forces guys were gentlemen while in married quaters, or living around them,

Dear All

Hello

Oh yes, Julie Ann, my grandmother was a stickler for the rules that you mention. Not half!

Dear Mr Old Geezer, what a gentleman!

Thank you all very much for the replies. Its really interesting to read peoples views and their experiences.

Take care of yourselves
Very best wishes to all
xx

Women wanted equality ,or was it just on their terms .? Robert

I work with children as young as 4 and unfortunatley i have noticed over the years ,the attitude of both parents and the child is becoming worse.No Manners, ,no Disiplin, and especially the boys have no respect for the girls even at that age,They only learn what they see and hear at home.So how are they ever to become real gentleman. There are still some good ones around thanfully I have one.Unfortunatley we did vote for Equality.
Moaning Minnie.

Just because Women Voted for Equality,it does,nt mean you have to forget your Natural Good Manners and Politeness,or inborn instincts to them.**M**.