General Chat

this is a great idea,well done,xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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My mum was my nan's carer for many years before she died. What we found amazing was all the things you weren't told about! You can arrange for the caree (if that's the right word) to have respite - where they go into a home or equivalent for a week or two at a time to give the carer a break/chance to go on holiday. In our area there is also I thing called 'crossroads', where someone can come and stay with the caree for so many hours a week - again to give the carer a break. Mum found these breaks so valuable, but unfortunately didn't find out about them for well over 10 years! Up 'til then I used to have to stay at mum's to look after nan to enable mum and dad to have a holiday. Also, once she got crossroads, we could all go out together for a few hours once a week - rather than someone having to stay at home with nan, as she could not be left on her own. If you don't ask about these services no-one will volunteer the information. AL

Good idea to bring this up Kris, my Gran was a carer for 15 years, very hard years for her and she fought for everything.

Carer’s Allowance is a benefit to help people who look after someone who is disabled. You do not have to be related to, or live with, the person you care for. Who can get Carer's Allowance? You can claim Carer’s Allowance if you are aged 16 or over and spend at least 35 hours a week caring for a person getting Attendance Allowance, or Disability Living Allowance (at the middle or highest rate for personal care), or Constant Attendance Allowance (at or above the normal maximum rate with an Industrial Injuries Disablement Benefit, or basic (full day) rate with a War Disablement Pension). Who cannot get Carer's Allowance? You can’t claim Carer’s Allowance if you are in full-time education with 21 hours or more a week of supervised study or earn more than £84 a week after certain deductions have been made (such as Income Tax). More about who can get Carer's Allowance How much do you get? The weekly rate is £46.95. This is reduced by the amount of certain other benefits, including State Pension, that you receive. If you receive certain other benefits at £46.95 or more a week, Carer’s Allowance cannot be paid to you as well. You may be able to get an additional amount for your husband, wife or civil partner or someone living with you who looks after your dependent children. How it’s paid Carer’s Allowance is normally paid directly into any account of your choice which accepts Direct Payment of benefits. This might be a bank, building society, or other account provider. You may be able to get someone else to collect your Carer’s Allowance if you wish. For help with this contact your bank, building society or other account provider. I Effect on other benefits and entitlements Claiming Carer’s Allowance may affect any other benefits, allowances, pensions and entitlements you, or the person you care for, are receiving. More about Carer's Allowance and the effect on other benefits How to claim You can ask for a claim form over the telephone, by contacting the Carer's Allowance Unit or your local benefits office.

Lovely idea Kris. When I was a carer there was nothing not much more now I imagine. Germaine x

Any carers not seen this thread? Ann Glos

My husband is my Carer........... but to be honest..i hate relying on anyone,i know within the next hour or so i will switch of, be unable to move till my stupid brain gets into gear,,i hate it, i have no choice, also know my writting changes and a lot have taken offence by the way i word things so my only choice is not to write,, i sit and wait ,and wait sometimes it clicks quick othertimes ....well i try to forget them but he dose a lot for me a hell of a lot that able body'd would not beleive,,,,,,,,,,,,,but i hate it so,,

brilliant thread i am a carer for my mum who has recently had a very severe stroke. although dad does the cooking,washing etc he doesnt have the strength to lift and clean mum. mum has the home care girls(who i work with) go in 4 times a day but i wash,change her pads and hoist her in between these visits. for example i was called round at 1am,3am and 6am this morning lol. i start work (doing caring for the elderly) at 7am so you can imagine,i was a bit cream crackered to say the least but i love my mum so much i wouldnt dream of letting her lay in dirty pads until the girls got there at 9. i finished work at 1pm today and mum called me while i was walking home. she needed cleaning so i went straight round. i hoisted her out of her wheelchair and onto the bed.cleaned her up and hoisted her back into her wheelchair. i have since been round again to do the same lol. im now off to work again until 8.30 and then back round mums at 10.30 to settle her for the night. susie

Susie, what I think is dreadful is that it appears that if you work as you do and care for a relative you are not able to claim the carers allowance yet look at what people such as yourselves do! I know that it is not about money but there is something very wrong with the system

This is a brilliant idea. I have a daughter of 13 who has a chromosome abnormality. She relies on me 24/7. Both mentally and physically disabled but forever laughing and smiling! I heard a conversatoin at her school today about siblings to these children getting treats? Does anybody know anything about this. Our only disadvantage, as it inevitebly always is, is that she is not terminally ill. I normally sit on the fence and read these threads but this one naturally caught my eye. Shirleybird

kris i know what you mean. dad gets carers allowance but not the full amount.although he is entitled to day and night carers allowance they ahve deducted £20 a week from it because thats what mum gets as a pension from work. and to rub salt into they wont give it to dad until 2nd october because mum has to be dependant on him for 6 months!! and its not back dated!! i see all sorts of disabilities in my job and it breaks my heart. what i dont understand is how come some people are entitled to things and others arent? i love my job as a carer .i feel that by the end of the day i have achieved something and helped those poor people that are less fortunate. love susie

i to am a carer for my wonderful mum and have looked after her for the last 9 years, i have also just recently started work as a home carer for an agency looking after the elderly, mainly dementia sufferers. i have had home care for mum in the past but stopped the service after i caught carers stealing and had to call the police to remove them from our flat! as for carers allowance, i am entitled to it as i dont work many hours, however it will be deducted from mum's dla benefit, so in theory she is paying me! nardia

Shirley, i am so pleased that you feel you can add to this thread. You woul of course be welcome on any thread but I am pleased this one helps you, it is a great idea of Kris's Gwen, if you want to post yet you feel you will have trouble with your words, why not just warn us and we will be prepared, no good sitting there wanting to add something but being scared. Normally if people know there is a genuine problem they are very kind. Ann Glos

thankyou to all you wonderfull carers incuding my OH xx

nadia i am a home carer.i absolutely love my job. ive been doing it for 16yrs now. im so sorry about the bad experience that you had with carers. i work for buckinghamshire county council social services department.we are vetted by the police every year and have extensive training courses that are mandatory. im sure you will love your job hun. and well done for looking after your mum. susie

as it's topical !

Good idea Kris, many carers out there just do it with out any support.

i look after my mum,and work as well,i feel better knowing its me doing it ,than a stranger.i cook all her meals and clean up,take her to get her pension.but shes always been a lovely mum,so its nice to give something back,xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

What a great idea, i find the school holidays a bind sometimes, all my friends have children at home so I dont like to call them and go on. When Im having a bad day with my daughter just to get it out would be a relief